Time To Move On

In our material world things deteriorate faster than you can imagine.

Relationships go down faster than objects. A car nowadays becomes older in a few years but a laptop becomes ancient in a matter of few weeks. Even the cellphone does not stand the vagaries of time. Life has become too fast for words and the time for moving on has become shorter by the day. Even kids move out faster today than earlier. I remember when my French friend asked me when I was moving out of my house, I was aghast at that question but when she moved on at the age of 16 to Nantes from her village in France I was wondering whether such a thing will ever happen in India. Now that it does nothing surprises me any more.

Now when we look at relationships in our age, they are flimsier than the will'o'wisps!

Getting married has become a fashion and then it is all about this is mine and that is yours.

No one is ever able to contend with someone who does not work for or in the relationship.

I was surprised to see my friend say that before marriage his girlfriend had told him that she is not going to enter the kitchen or do any household work, since its not her job. He appointed a full time maid to take care of the kitchen and the house even when he couldn't afford it. Later they had two kids and even those she refused to tend to so there was another maid to take charge.

I guess when the newer concept of the metro sexual male came into being it gave a sudden shudder to the institution of marriage. He works in the kitchen, brings veggies and household stuff and also attends to the kids demands. Working outside he even does laundry and attends to his personal toilet. Now thats the kind of husband I want would be the demand by the modern woman. But he is just another idea which has gone bad. Such a person only exists in the dreams. Now these are a few reasons why the marriage goes on the rocks. Every individual has needs and demands which can never be fulfilled by any single person. Take the case of Draupadi also she could never get her fulfilment by a single individual so she had to get married to five different people.

Now if we believe that marriage is complete and fulfilled by a single individual then it is not true because we have tremendous desires left behind. These cannot be got from a single individual so we look outside for getting them. Just the way we discard our old phones and laptops.

Man needs grow faster and faster and needs his desires to be fulfilled and is willing to pay the price for it. I am not giving here any solutions for getting out of the trap but we need to address the desires and get rid of them if we can. Buddha had declared that the root cause of all our problems are the desires and we need to get rid of them. So let us not go into any relationship with a laundry bag of desires and then expect fulfillment. Lets go with an open mind and not try to get ideal in any relationship but just be contented and tone down our desires before stepping in.